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I dislike the idea of upgrades because of experiences on forums in the past, where
people assume the role of being "better" than someone that does not have an upgrade.
Everyone on Lewd is equal, I'd prefer to keep it that way.
I don't like asking for donations at all, because unlike most other forum owners,
I'm not hosting the forum to make money; and milking money from my friends is something
I never want to do.
I understand your opinion about not milking your friends money but donations are donations to keep the site, not to make bank.
But, unless you're rich or have enough money not to care about paying this you'll need to do something. I mean, I have a group of friends(Internet), we've been together up and down for around 4 years. Basically it was a game private server, happened to be popular and good in glory days, stable through donations etc owner profited back then.
Anyways. The servers died and only a small group of us are left (Around 20). Right now there are some months he can't pay it, others where we pay it. Either way, he's not making any money from it yet we're the reason the site WAS still up (The forums got closed a month ago due to no more money). It was a thing that went both ways
I mean, you can ask for donations. As you mention, FRIENDS, are there to back you up. If you're going out to eat with friends, I'm sure plenty of times you all put in money to pay the bill or cover someone who doesn't have enough money. Donations would work here that way, it'd be the way for your friends help you pay something which we all use because it wouldn't be fair going out with friends and leaving you pay everything, right?
