Suicid3Panda's Suicidal Game Review

by suicid3Panda

best bulli
Posts: 786
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Joined: Jun 2015
11-13-2015, 04:43 AM (This post was last modified: 11-13-2015, 04:53 AM by suicid3Panda.)
#27956 (1)
Another unfair Review

Hello Lewders! It's been a long while since my last review. Today, I would like to introduce you to a game I played called 猥訓道δ~姫は淫奔な弟子~. I can't place my finger on an exact genre to pigeon-hole it into, so let's just say "it's weird." The game starts off with the main character in a room with what appears to be a church official. A shit load of dialog ensues. I imagine the priest is trying to verify if the protagonist is male or female (as was I) because he didn't want to get caught molesting a girl. Just as he decides to make his move, a clearly female, maid walks in the room.  They talk for another 10 minutes or so then the maid transforms into a twin of the protag, and the real protag leaves the room. This happens because anime. 

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"You can be sure I won't molest this one since I'm fairly certain it doesn't have a penis." 

You will notice that the game's graphics appear as if it could have been made for the Sega Genesis.  This greatly pleased by nostalgic eyes. The artwork throughout the game is done in a gorgeous 16 bit art style. It is truly one of the high points; however, let's get back to the story because that's something the developers really wanted you to get, as I'll mention later. Let's just hope that David Cage and Hideo Kojima never make H-games!

So after the protag's lengthy introduction, we are then taken to a man getting a blow job in a sale boat. Bonus points for introducing an H-Scene so soon, but muddy Sega graphics weren't meant to show extreme detail.  If I didn't already know what was happening here, I may think that this girl is simply nodding in agreement while taking a nap on her friend's lap. I'm not sure exactly how long this scene went on for in real time, but it amounted to 5+ minutes of me furiously clicking through the dialogue. All the dialogue is un-skippable by the way, even if you're repeating a scene.

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The dialogue for this scene was actually this guy reading that entire book aloud.

Eventually the scene ends and takes you directly into another one where the game responds to your hatred of un-skippable text with un-skippable animations.  When these characters finally end their boat journey, (which I was able to witness in real time), they go rent a room at an inn. During this next stint of endless dialogue, you get to watch as the blow job dude pulls out his iPhone to activate a vibrating bullet inside of the girl.  Each time he does it, you get to see the girl in the pose below, as she undulates back and forth for about 8 seconds. He does this, no shit, about 25 times! You guessed it! It's un-skippable! What a horrible night to have a curse! In total, I had to watch that shit for over 3 excruciating minutes! Without the vibrating, this scene was easily 10 minutes on it's own.

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The inn keeper is getting impatient because the scene is going on for entirely too long.

At this point in the game (roughly 30 minutes from start) you are prompted to interact for the first time. A sudden QTE prompts you to press an arrow key. You have about a 2 second window, and if you're me, you will be half asleep when the prompts appears. There is NO prior warning, it just happens out of no where. Needless to say, I missed it. If you fail, you are robbed of a slightly different animation. The game plays in a 600x400 window, keeping in theme of the point in history from which it got its graphics. It doesn't do much in helping you see the damn QTE Prompt. Since the scene ended right after that part, and the game offers you a chance to go back and try it again, I opted to try again out of curiosity. Little did I know it took me ALL THE WAY BACK to the very beginning of the scene where it shows them docking at the port! AAAAHHHH!!!! After bracing myself for another eternity, I made sure to be ready this time, and.... THEY CHANGED THE FUCKING INPUT BUTTON!!!! So to succeed, you have to be LOCKED in focus on this game the whole time, waiting for a seemingly random opportunity to press a random button. I did not try again. The game gave more of these later, so I said, "fuck it."   

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This is a later scene. Can you see the QTE prompt? I actually got this one! If you time it just right, the protag will lift her legs in the air... was it worth it?

Fast forward a bit, and the protag finally joins these characters in the story (long fucking boat ride!) I got to sit through more of that guys vibrator app antics, and a whole lot more text. I have no fucking clue why anything is happening at this point. The protag just sort of wanders into their room and stays with them. The protag also has a giant sword which she occasionally pulls out and does nothing with. Maybe it was the frequent, unfulfilled threats, or maybe he was just being a dick, but blow job dude hires a robot to attack the protag.

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Look at their faces! I'm pretty sure they are just being dicks.

We now get to the battle system! After playing for more than 2 hours by this point, I was less than willing to devote much more time to this rubbish, poorly paced game, but I was curious to see anything different. Now I admit, the battle system seems like it could be really cool.  The problem was what I had to do to reach this point! Basically, blow job dude molests you based off of selected commands, and the power you receive from your sexual assault can be used as a weapon against the opponent. Sure... Don't ask me how this works, I hardly dedicated much time to experiment with the identical command icons, but somehow I performed a "Sexual Combo" which gave a longer molestation scene and a more powerful attack.  That's basically all there is to it, and I can't imagine there is more to this game.  Feel free to check it out yourself with the links I've provided, because I'm sure as shit done with it!

[Image: 687474703a2f2f6f72696730382e64657669616e...392e6a7067]
As soon as he got done talking, he immediately checked his Twitter... what a douche! 

Final breakdown


The art style is great, but the animation is used in a way which often obscures an of the actual lewdness. The battle system seems like it has some real promise.  I would have been more than willing to delve deeper if the game was just more of that from the beginning. Unfortunately, the entire game is bogged down with seemingly ENDLESS dialogue scenes.  The scenes offer no choice or impact on the game whatsoever. Even if I was able to read and understand it all, it would still be terribly annoying. Considering that, if you can't read it at all, sitting through it becomes an unbearable chore.

Store page: DLsite

unused CGs

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Posts: 3,317
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11-13-2015, 06:30 AM
#27965 (2)
It's great that I can see so much dick and pussy in this.
oh yeah, uh

cute 10/10

Lives are meant to be spent
Now I am in debt
And I am tired of borrowing from the people I love
- Phil Kaye

osu! || Kitsu

best bulli
Posts: 786
Threads: 52
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11-14-2015, 06:08 AM
#28098 (3)
ty loko qt!
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