Share some advice for those with social anxiety?

by Apophany

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09-11-2016, 05:18 PM
#46611 (26)
(09-11-2016, 04:47 PM)malmon Wrote:
(09-11-2016, 04:41 PM)based_bluetawn Wrote: Try amphetamines like methamphetamine or adderal (which is identical), don't smoke them, snort or eat and don't use more than you have to because they are fun and tempting, don't redose, yes, meth causes dopamine system damage, regular amphetamines do not.

I learned more from a couple uses of amphetamines than I did in a college class on public speaking (though it did help).

I went from socially anxious to an extremely nerfed anxiety response.

That's my experience, don't take it as truth. Playing with drugs is a dangerous game.

I personally don't really like any drugs. They tend to make me feel like shit.

Yeah, I don't either. I've been on a total of 14 of them just within the year. The only ones that didn't give me horrible side effects just did nothing at all.

And when I say horrible, I mean it. Depakote had me crying nonstop and in a constant state of fear and loneliness. Abilify made me feel like I had to pace continuously or my head would explode. Seroquel caused spasms so bad I couldn't sleep. Pristiq destroyed my digestive tract and gave me a pounding headache. Etc.

Drugs are (mostly) bad, mmkay.
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10-13-2016, 02:17 AM
#61328 (27)
I've had it since sometime in high school. 23 now, and still dealing with it, but it's been getting easier. A few years ago it was so bad that I literally couldn't speak a word in groups of 2 or more people. But I've had a lot of shit happen to me that caused me to give less and less fucks over time. And not only that, you also start to realize that your social anxiety is ridiculous and that there's literally no point in letting your mind have such a negative control over your body and actions. You also need to realize that nobody really cares about you as much as you think they do. I also have adopted a sort of negative belief system that is helping my social anxiety slowly get better. We're all going to die one day, and no one is going to remember your little moments or even your entire person in one hundred years, which is nothing when compared to the time span of the Earth. Everything is meaningless, why live miserably, when there's no point?

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10-13-2016, 02:39 AM
#61330 (28)
I see one thing you all have in common. You are all into anime. Half joking would share a story but am on the bus.

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10-14-2016, 12:19 PM
#61452 (29)
(10-13-2016, 02:17 AM)Yoko Wrote: I've had it since sometime in high school. 23 now, and still dealing with it, but it's been getting easier. A few years ago it was so bad that I literally couldn't speak a word in groups of 2 or more people. But I've had a lot of shit happen to me that caused me to give less and less fucks over time. And not only that, you also start to realize that your social anxiety is ridiculous and that there's literally no point in letting your mind have such a negative control over your body and actions. You also need to realize that nobody really cares about you as much as you think they do. I also have adopted a sort of negative belief system that is helping my social anxiety slowly get better. We're all going to die one day, and no one is going to remember your little moments or even your entire person in one hundred years, which is nothing when compared to the time span of the Earth. Everything is meaningless, why live miserably, when there's no point?
So deep as always. You seem a tad depressed with that thinking though.

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10-14-2016, 06:29 PM (This post was last modified: 10-14-2016, 06:29 PM by MAUSJAUS.)
#61475 (30)
If I could just learn how football works, I would have an endless box of communication materials to work with.
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01-24-2017, 08:49 PM
#65458 (31)
Okay.. *reading the whole of this thread*

>Thanks for the advice..

I'll try it


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01-25-2017, 08:18 AM (This post was last modified: 01-25-2017, 08:23 AM by GlassMoon.)
#65460 (32)
For concrete steps, this is the best thing I've found:

[Image: 68747470733a2f2f752e6e79612e69732f6e67787570652e706e67]

I've gotten over a lot of my worst social anxiety, but I still seem to have trouble making friends. Most people who are passionate about the same things as me either have personalities that I greatly dislike or are senior citizens.

I always get very anxious when politics/social issues/etc. come up as discussion points, which is what my biggest issue is now.
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01-25-2017, 09:19 AM
#65461 (33)
I still feel like a child when I'm talking to another adult. I don't understand crap about politics, the economy, social topics, even hobby/pop culture stuff is lost on me 90% of the time. You know what my strongest conversation starter is? The weather. Yep, I'm doomed to be that 40 year old weirdo sitting on the park bench saying "How about this weather we're having huh.. *takes long sip of coffee*". I think that's the reason I like animals so much, they just listen to whatever inane things you have to say. The internet's the same way. I like reading about people's mundane lives.
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malmon
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01-25-2017, 09:54 AM
#65462 (34)
(01-25-2017, 09:19 AM)Xen Wrote: I still feel like a child when I'm talking to another adult. I don't understand crap about politics, the economy, social topics, even hobby/pop culture stuff is lost on me 90% of the time. You know what my strongest conversation starter is? The weather. Yep, I'm doomed to be that 40 year old weirdo sitting on the park bench saying "How about this weather we're having huh.. *takes long sip of coffee*". I think that's the reason I like animals so much, they just listen to whatever inane things you have to say. The internet's the same way. I like reading about people's mundane lives.

If only it was acceptable to hang out without talking about anything

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01-26-2017, 09:47 PM
#65503 (35)
(01-25-2017, 09:54 AM)malmon Wrote:
(01-25-2017, 09:19 AM)Xen Wrote: I still feel like a child when I'm talking to another adult. I don't understand crap about politics, the economy, social topics, even hobby/pop culture stuff is lost on me 90% of the time. You know what my strongest conversation starter is? The weather. Yep, I'm doomed to be that 40 year old weirdo sitting on the park bench saying "How about this weather we're having huh.. *takes long sip of coffee*". I think that's the reason I like animals so much, they just listen to whatever inane things you have to say. The internet's the same way. I like reading about people's mundane lives.

If only it was acceptable to hang out without talking about anything

I think it is in some cases, but only with a very close friend or a significant other. There is a such thing as comfortable silence. It occurs when you're comfortable enough around each other to just relax, admire each other enough to simply enjoy one another's presence, and/or know that there's no need for conversation until it comes naturally. Imagine sitting by a campfire with your waifu/husbando. You don't really need to say a lot, do you? You can just stare at the flames and enjoy their company--maybe cuddle a little bit.

I don't know. Maybe it's not a thing and I'm just crazy. Let me know what you think.
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01-26-2017, 09:49 PM
#65504 (36)
(01-26-2017, 09:47 PM)Apophany Wrote:
(01-25-2017, 09:54 AM)malmon Wrote:
(01-25-2017, 09:19 AM)Xen Wrote: I still feel like a child when I'm talking to another adult. I don't understand crap about politics, the economy, social topics, even hobby/pop culture stuff is lost on me 90% of the time. You know what my strongest conversation starter is? The weather. Yep, I'm doomed to be that 40 year old weirdo sitting on the park bench saying "How about this weather we're having huh.. *takes long sip of coffee*". I think that's the reason I like animals so much, they just listen to whatever inane things you have to say. The internet's the same way. I like reading about people's mundane lives.

If only it was acceptable to hang out without talking about anything

I think it is in some cases, but only with a very close friend or a significant other. There is a such thing as comfortable silence. It occurs when you're comfortable enough around each other to just relax, admire each other enough to simply enjoy one another's presence, and/or know that there's no need for conversation until it comes naturally. Imagine sitting by a campfire with your waifu/husbando. You don't really need to say a lot, do you? You can just stare at the flames and enjoy their company--maybe cuddle a little bit.

I don't know. Maybe it's not a thing and I'm just crazy. Let me know what you think.

Well, I sure hope that it's a thing, because cuddling by a campfire sounds awesome.

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01-27-2017, 01:48 AM
#65509 (37)
(09-11-2016, 04:41 PM)based_bluetawn Wrote: Try amphetamines like methamphetamine or adderal (which is identical), don't smoke them, snort or eat and don't use more than you have to because they are fun and tempting, don't redose, yes, meth causes dopamine system damage, regular amphetamines do not.

I learned more from a couple uses of amphetamines than I did in a college class on public speaking (though it did help).

I went from socially anxious to an extremely nerfed anxiety response.

That's my experience, don't take it as truth. Playing with drugs is a dangerous game.

Doing meth is just retarded in the first place it cooks your brain lmao.
I personally wouldn't advise doing hard drugs just to combat anxiety go get prescribed xanex or something else that's been clinically tested and is SAFE.

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01-27-2017, 08:55 AM
#65515 (38)
(01-27-2017, 01:48 AM)Shiro Wrote:
(09-11-2016, 04:41 PM)based_bluetawn Wrote: Try amphetamines like methamphetamine or adderal (which is identical), don't smoke them, snort or eat and don't use more than you have to because they are fun and tempting, don't redose, yes, meth causes dopamine system damage, regular amphetamines do not.

I learned more from a couple uses of amphetamines than I did in a college class on public speaking (though it did help).

I went from socially anxious to an extremely nerfed anxiety response.

That's my experience, don't take it as truth. Playing with drugs is a dangerous game.

Doing meth is just retarded in the first place it cooks your brain lmao.
I personally wouldn't advise doing hard drugs just to combat anxiety go get prescribed xanex or something else that's been clinically tested and is SAFE.

This one TED talk I saw, they talked about using Ketamine for this sort of stuff. In mice, it seems to be considerably more effective at a much lower dose with fewer side effects than (meth)amphetamines. I haven't really read in to its effectiveness on humans though.

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01-27-2017, 09:13 AM
#65516 (39)
(01-27-2017, 08:55 AM)malmon Wrote:
(01-27-2017, 01:48 AM)Shiro Wrote:
(09-11-2016, 04:41 PM)based_bluetawn Wrote: Try amphetamines like methamphetamine or adderal (which is identical), don't smoke them, snort or eat and don't use more than you have to because they are fun and tempting, don't redose, yes, meth causes dopamine system damage, regular amphetamines do not.

I learned more from a couple uses of amphetamines than I did in a college class on public speaking (though it did help).

I went from socially anxious to an extremely nerfed anxiety response.

That's my experience, don't take it as truth. Playing with drugs is a dangerous game.

Doing meth is just retarded in the first place it cooks your brain lmao.
I personally wouldn't advise doing hard drugs just to combat anxiety go get prescribed xanex or something else that's been clinically tested and is SAFE.

This one TED talk I saw, they talked about using Ketamine for this sort of stuff. In mice, it seems to be considerably more effective at a much lower dose with fewer side effects than (meth)amphetamines. I haven't really read in to its effectiveness on humans though.

Drugs are bad, mm'kay? Naturally I can't speak for anyone else on the forum, but every case of depression/anxiety I've seen IRL saw their condition significantly worsen if they used any form of drugs; be it prescribed or otherwise.

And of course, its worth noting that drugs aren't some sorta miracle-cure; my former roommate has taken antidepressants since middle school, but without a strong personal motivation and the appropriate support structure at home, all he's done for the past ten years is increase the dose. These give him transient bursts of happiness, perhaps two weeks long, before he relapses into his normal state.

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01-27-2017, 09:24 AM (This post was last modified: 01-27-2017, 09:27 AM by moeki.)
#65517 (40)
(09-11-2016, 05:18 PM)Apophany Wrote: Yeah, I don't either. I've been on a total of 14 of them just within the year. The only ones that didn't give me horrible side effects just did nothing at all.

And when I say horrible, I mean it. Depakote had me crying nonstop and in a constant state of fear and loneliness. Abilify made me feel like I had to pace continuously or my head would explode. Seroquel caused spasms so bad I couldn't sleep. Pristiq destroyed my digestive tract and gave me a pounding headache. Etc.

Drugs are (mostly) bad, mmkay.

i've been prescribed to seroquel for two years now, they change my medication around a lot so it's sort of the only constant one? it kind of sucks because my doctors are like 'hey so you're stable now so let's just give you this instead' which means more side effects and then usually doesn't work so then they go to the one i had before that. the seroquel is the only thing that's helped me long-term so far. they give me tiny anxiety bursts at night but the alternative is just being so scared all the time and literally thinking i'll die. i don't know. i'm mostly just grateful they didn't put me on 'real' antidepressants back then that make you dependant. :s

were you prescribed to it too?

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01-27-2017, 12:35 PM
#65524 (41)
I have dealt with social anxiety since I was around the age of 12, and I still struggle with it occasionally. A good way that I have found to help oneself with such an affliction is by reading more, not necessarily fiction, but philosophy. If you can learn about how people think you can learn how people work. It's also just very thougt provoking and gives you many ideas to apply in your life, especially when talking to people. I can't really reccomend drugs or anything like that, but another way of treating social anxiety, at least that I have found is by doing a sort of exposure theraphy and talking with people who you are close with regularly and trying to learn how to work out a conversation and how to carry yourself around other people. While I think that it will require determination to do so, once you learn how to talk with people, it makes it much easier to be around them. At least that's how I felt after I kinda learned how to move a conversation along. Find something that may put you into contact with like-minded people around you. If you have common interests with someone it makes it so much easier to start talking to them, as you already have a conversation starter already with your interests. I really hope this helped you out~!

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01-27-2017, 05:15 PM (This post was last modified: 01-27-2017, 05:16 PM by Shiro.)
#65532 (42)
(01-27-2017, 08:55 AM)malmon Wrote:
(01-27-2017, 01:48 AM)Shiro Wrote:
(09-11-2016, 04:41 PM)based_bluetawn Wrote: Try amphetamines like methamphetamine or adderal (which is identical), don't smoke them, snort or eat and don't use more than you have to because they are fun and tempting, don't redose, yes, meth causes dopamine system damage, regular amphetamines do not.

I learned more from a couple uses of amphetamines than I did in a college class on public speaking (though it did help).

I went from socially anxious to an extremely nerfed anxiety response.

That's my experience, don't take it as truth. Playing with drugs is a dangerous game.

Doing meth is just retarded in the first place it cooks your brain lmao.
I personally wouldn't advise doing hard drugs just to combat anxiety go get prescribed xanex or something else that's been clinically tested and is SAFE.

This one TED talk I saw, they talked about using Ketamine for this sort of stuff. In mice, it seems to be considerably more effective at a much lower dose with fewer side effects than (meth)amphetamines. I haven't really read in to its effectiveness on humans though.

As someone who used to abuse Ketamine I can say it just fucking kills you and it's super addictive. Rip my bladder.

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01-27-2017, 05:44 PM
#65534 (43)
(01-27-2017, 05:15 PM)Shiro Wrote:
(01-27-2017, 08:55 AM)malmon Wrote:
(01-27-2017, 01:48 AM)Shiro Wrote:
(09-11-2016, 04:41 PM)based_bluetawn Wrote: Try amphetamines like methamphetamine or adderal (which is identical), don't smoke them, snort or eat and don't use more than you have to because they are fun and tempting, don't redose, yes, meth causes dopamine system damage, regular amphetamines do not.

I learned more from a couple uses of amphetamines than I did in a college class on public speaking (though it did help).

I went from socially anxious to an extremely nerfed anxiety response.

That's my experience, don't take it as truth. Playing with drugs is a dangerous game.

Doing meth is just retarded in the first place it cooks your brain lmao.
I personally wouldn't advise doing hard drugs just to combat anxiety go get prescribed xanex or something else that's been clinically tested and is SAFE.

This one TED talk I saw, they talked about using Ketamine for this sort of stuff. In mice, it seems to be considerably more effective at a much lower dose with fewer side effects than (meth)amphetamines. I haven't really read in to its effectiveness on humans though.

As someone who used to abuse Ketamine I can say it just fucking kills you and it's super addictive. Rip my bladder.

Well, the same can be said for many drugs, hence why you're not supposed to take loads of them. Then again, afaik, most antidepressants are addictive as well, mostly because of the withdrawl symptoms (at least that seems to be the case for the ones I was meant to take).

Also, here's the talk I'm on about


Though it is a shame that some rely on drugs

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01-27-2017, 07:49 PM
#65544 (44)
(01-27-2017, 05:44 PM)malmon Wrote: Well, the same can be said for many drugs, hence why you're not supposed to take loads of them. Then again, afaik, most antidepressants are addictive as well, mostly because of the withdrawl symptoms (at least that seems to be the case for the ones I was meant to take).

Also, here's the talk I'm on about

-snip-

Though it is a shame that some rely on drugs


"Though it is a shame that some rely on drugs" Truest thing I've heard all year. Preach it.

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01-27-2017, 08:07 PM
#65547 (45)
(01-27-2017, 05:15 PM)Shiro Wrote:
(01-27-2017, 08:55 AM)malmon Wrote:
(01-27-2017, 01:48 AM)Shiro Wrote:
(09-11-2016, 04:41 PM)based_bluetawn Wrote: Try amphetamines like methamphetamine or adderal (which is identical), don't smoke them, snort or eat and don't use more than you have to because they are fun and tempting, don't redose, yes, meth causes dopamine system damage, regular amphetamines do not.

I learned more from a couple uses of amphetamines than I did in a college class on public speaking (though it did help).

I went from socially anxious to an extremely nerfed anxiety response.

That's my experience, don't take it as truth. Playing with drugs is a dangerous game.

Doing meth is just retarded in the first place it cooks your brain lmao.
I personally wouldn't advise doing hard drugs just to combat anxiety go get prescribed xanex or something else that's been clinically tested and is SAFE.

This one TED talk I saw, they talked about using Ketamine for this sort of stuff. In mice, it seems to be considerably more effective at a much lower dose with fewer side effects than (meth)amphetamines. I haven't really read in to its effectiveness on humans though.

As someone who used to abuse Ketamine I can say it just fucking kills you and it's super addictive. Rip my bladder.

Aye, drug addiction is the worst. Congrats on beating it, though! :D

(01-27-2017, 12:35 PM)Тачанка-чан Wrote: I have dealt with social anxiety since I was around the age of 12, and I still struggle with it occasionally. A good way that I have found to help oneself with such an affliction is by reading more, not necessarily fiction, but philosophy. If you can learn about how people think you can learn how people work. It's also just very thougt provoking and gives you many ideas to apply in your life, especially when talking to people.

Can confirm: Reading does wonders for improving one's social skills. From what I've seen, it not only builds your vocabulary and teaches you clever figures of speech, but also forces you to practice paying attention and using your imagination; both of which are key skills in any conversation.

I personally do not find philosophy palatable for this technique, though it can certainly be interesting. Instead, I like to read old novels from the 19th century; the prose is flowery and very complex, but it tends to get easier after the tenth page.

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01-27-2017, 09:31 PM
#65553 (46)
(01-27-2017, 09:24 AM)moeki Wrote:
(09-11-2016, 05:18 PM)Apophany Wrote: Yeah, I don't either. I've been on a total of 14 of them just within the year. The only ones that didn't give me horrible side effects just did nothing at all.

And when I say horrible, I mean it. Depakote had me crying nonstop and in a constant state of fear and loneliness. Abilify made me feel like I had to pace continuously or my head would explode. Seroquel caused spasms so bad I couldn't sleep. Pristiq destroyed my digestive tract and gave me a pounding headache. Etc.

Drugs are (mostly) bad, mmkay.

i've been prescribed to seroquel for two years now, they change my medication around a lot so it's sort of the only constant one? it kind of sucks because my doctors are like 'hey so you're stable now so let's just give you this instead' which means more side effects and then usually doesn't work so then they go to the one i had before that. the seroquel is the only thing that's helped me long-term so far. they give me tiny anxiety bursts at night but the alternative is just being so scared all the time and literally thinking i'll die. i don't know. i'm mostly just grateful they didn't put me on 'real' antidepressants back then that make you dependant. :s

were you prescribed to it too?

Addictive anti-depressants? Yeah, I've been on more than a few. But they usually triggered hypomanic episodes. Eventually my body had rejected so many drugs that they decided to do some genetic testing, which is how they found out my metabolism is incompatible with all but a select few drugs on the market. So now I'm on lurasidone and levomilnacipran. They don't seem to be helping much, but they're not causing me any trouble either, so I take them just so people get off my case.
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01-28-2017, 06:44 PM
#65556 (47)
Hello. I have social anxiety and a mild form of agoraphobia. Smoking ganja helps but I always carry my lucky slammer (slammer for the old game POGS) and when im in public I am always holding, twiddling and rolling it in my fingers. It helps me focus on not dropping it when I would normally focus on everyone else. Get a fidget item to attract more of your attention. Hope this helps!
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03-02-2017, 11:50 AM
#66800 (48)
I suffer from Generalized Anxiety Disorder, I'm currently trying to get the right medication for it. But one thing I suggest for people with social anxiety, is to go online more whether it's 4chan which is anonymous, other image boards, forums, online games, or anything else online that helps you talk to people. Kind of like the OP said. But these people have to realize nothing good will come of it unless they make that first move, which it will be difficult at first but it's definitely possible, just keep trying to start a conversation online with people you don't really know, people who have no clue who you look like, how you act in person, who you are, etc. Talking online reduces a lot of anxiety, because there's nothing really to judge at first. How I became a little more extroverted was that I started making for friends in games Minecraft and WoW specifically and it helped me be a bit more extroverted and more open. Now it's not going to completely remove your anxiety completely, there will still be times where you're just too scared to strike a conversation, and I still go through that. But doing this does help a lot more than a person would think.
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03-02-2017, 11:56 AM
#66801 (49)
(01-27-2017, 05:44 PM)malmon Wrote:
(01-27-2017, 05:15 PM)Shiro Wrote:
(01-27-2017, 08:55 AM)malmon Wrote:
(01-27-2017, 01:48 AM)Shiro Wrote: Doing meth is just retarded in the first place it cooks your brain lmao.
I personally wouldn't advise doing hard drugs just to combat anxiety go get prescribed xanex or something else that's been clinically tested and is SAFE.

This one TED talk I saw, they talked about using Ketamine for this sort of stuff. In mice, it seems to be considerably more effective at a much lower dose with fewer side effects than (meth)amphetamines. I haven't really read in to its effectiveness on humans though.

As someone who used to abuse Ketamine I can say it just fucking kills you and it's super addictive. Rip my bladder.

Well, the same can be said for many drugs, hence why you're not supposed to take loads of them. Then again, afaik, most antidepressants are addictive as well, mostly because of the withdrawl symptoms (at least that seems to be the case for the ones I was meant to take).

Also, here's the talk I'm on about


Though it is a shame that some rely on drugs

It might be, but some people just can't get themselves fixed and can't cope with their mental problems. I've spent 15 years of my life with GAD, it sucks and it controls me. I have fights with my brain everyday, meditation doesn't work for me, breathing nah fam rather just not. What I'm saying is though it may be a shame, we have to rely on drugs because there's nothing else for us. Not everyone has to take drugs for it, but not everyone can meditate and control their breathing and instantly feel better after doing it for 10 years.
TL;DR some people's problems are just that serious.
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Kohai
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05-14-2017, 11:00 AM
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The most effective thing that helped me with social anxiety was finding a job. I used to restrain myself from talking with other people or tend to finish conversation as fast as possible to get back to my comfort zone. These things stopped, since communicating with people has become what I'm getting paid for. I've discovered that there is no longer a place for doubt in communication, when it's a matter of being fired or not. Of course my job didn't cure all my social anxiety, but it somehow affected how I deal with social situations in my private life as well. I've found some analogy between being social at work and being social, when meeting up with friends or getting to know a new person.