Make one of your favorite games sound as shitty as possible

by None_At_All

Melancholy
すけべ
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03-15-2016, 07:52 PM (This post was last modified: 03-15-2016, 07:52 PM by Melancholy.)
#38255 (51)
You kill people over and over until you're big enough to kill more people.

Spoiler

Mount & Blade

Aya
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Kohai
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03-18-2016, 05:18 PM
#38353 (52)
You play the role of an emo student with a sword, fully capable of devastating the planet if certain cutscenes actually flowed into the game itself. You and your friends can summon giant monsters to fight for you, but by the time they actually appear you could've done more damage by hitting stuff. As a bonus, using these giant monsters costs you your memory, which probably explains why you're so sad all the time.

Also your teacher is into BDSM.

Spoiler

Final Fantasy VIII
Lokorfi
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03-19-2016, 06:43 AM
#38400 (53)
You look for gold while getting shot at.

Spoiler

Uncharted

imdedandbanned
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03-21-2016, 09:45 AM
#38519 (54)
Some people told you that you are a brave person for trying to help the village, when all they cared about are their asses, so they threw you in a portal and sacrificed you to demons.
Aya
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03-21-2016, 09:56 AM
#38520 (55)
(03-21-2016, 09:45 AM)Exler Wrote: Some people told you that you are a brave person for trying to help the village, when all they cared about are their asses, so they threw you in a portal and sacrificed you to demons.

Corruption of Champions? xD
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Kitten
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03-21-2016, 12:53 PM (This post was last modified: 03-21-2016, 12:53 PM by Kitten.)
#38527 (56)
You look at pictures of characters from a game (that is well over 10 years old and constantly losing followers.) And then make decisions where to move the pictures using a red arrow and a lot of RNG with the end goal of eventually getting more pictures to interact with and a shiny golden shape with a number in it next to your name for a few weeks before it disappears and you have to spend another 200 hours grinding to get it back.

Spoiler

Hearthstone =^_~=
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Lokorfi
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03-21-2016, 02:40 PM
#38529 (57)
You have to stop a bunch of soul diamonds from being cracked by ugly monsters.

Spoiler

Dungeon Defenders

EwanLan
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03-21-2016, 05:29 PM (This post was last modified: 03-26-2016, 01:59 AM by EwanLan.)
#38536 (58)
You get to kill your son

MAJOR SPOILER AHEAD | OPEN AT YOUR OWN RISK


Fallout 4

edit: fixed up the major spoiler, the other people who replied to my post should fix it up
Kitten
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03-21-2016, 09:19 PM
#38541 (59)
(03-21-2016, 05:29 PM)EwanLan Wrote: You get to kill your son.

Spoiler


Fallout 4

Aww.. This one actually was a spoiler for a modern game I haven't gotten around to playing yet. :(
Lokorfi
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03-22-2016, 04:48 PM
#38560 (60)
It's not happening.

Spoiler

Valve threequels.

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matt
Unregistered
 
03-22-2016, 05:07 PM
#38563 (61)
You turn into a squid.

Spoiler

Bloodborne
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losi
gay retard
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03-22-2016, 11:02 PM (This post was last modified: 03-22-2016, 11:04 PM by losi.)
#38589 (62)
People pay tons of money for cool paint jobs on their guns. Then they proceed to shoot each other in a civilized manner.

Spoiler

csgo

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losi
gay retard
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03-22-2016, 11:04 PM
#38590 (63)
(03-21-2016, 05:29 PM)EwanLan Wrote: You get to kill your son.

Spoiler


Fallout 4

Oh. Well fuck me. I shouldn't have opened that spoiler. Shitttttttttt.

mumu
lil' fox
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03-25-2016, 10:51 PM (This post was last modified: 03-25-2016, 10:51 PM by mumu.)
#38711 (64)
some chick came and got her husbando killed and smoked some crack raising him from the dead

Spoiler

final fantasy xiv: a realm reborn (the tam-tara deepcroft (hard))

[Image: 68747470733a2f2f696d672e62757a7a66656564...362e676966]
None_At_All
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03-26-2016, 12:20 AM (This post was last modified: 03-26-2016, 12:28 AM by None_At_All.)
#38719 (65)
Better late than never, I guess.

If your post contains an actual, honest-to-goodness spoiler, consider formatting spoiler boxes.

Code:
[size=x-large][spoiler mode="nsfw" title="Citizen Kane spoilers"][/size]
[size=medium]
Rosebud.
[/size]
[/spoiler]
Will result in:

Citizen Kane spoilers



Rosebud.



EDIT: I was trying to nest spoiler boxes but I'm not sure if that's possible ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

In reality, all he's doing is pushing the same buttons he always has, nothing has changed. The longer he spends here, the more invested he gets, the more he forgets which life is the real one.
----
Steam | HBird
EwanLan
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03-26-2016, 01:56 AM (This post was last modified: 03-26-2016, 01:58 AM by EwanLan.)
#38722 (66)
(03-26-2016, 12:20 AM)None_At_All Wrote: None_At_All
Code:
[size=x-large][spoiler mode="nsfw" title="Citizen Kane spoilers"][/size]
[size=medium]
Rosebud.
[/size]
[/spoiler]
Will result in:

Citizen Kane spoilers



Rosebud.


That will not really work well to prevent a spoiler if it includes the game title in the spoiler :P
a better alternative is replacing "X game spoilers" with a generic "Major Spoiler" warning like this

Code:
"y"
[size=x-large][spoiler mode="nsfw" title="MAJOR SPOILER AHEAD | OPEN AT YOUR OWN RISK"][/size]
"x"
[/spoiler]
Anyway my post is updated now so hopefully that should reduce any more major spoilers
Dave
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04-04-2016, 12:32 AM
#39199 (67)
You use glory holes to free yourself from captivity.

Spoiler

Portal 2
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Haruspex
Certified Glompologist
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04-11-2016, 12:03 AM
#39475 (68)
You work yourself to death in the far future. Sometimes literally.

Your co-workers are crazy, possibly out to murder you specifically.

Your workplace explodes on a regular basis. When it doesn't, it's littered in blood, xenomorphs and fish. On fire, too, if someone has been working hard.

Depending on where you land, you'll probably be shot to death by Marines, dragged off by the clown or strangled to death by a - literal - catgirl.

A corgi is your only friend.
Equinox
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04-11-2016, 12:54 AM
#39476 (69)
you go on missions to fix things just to destroy the whole place and leave


"The entire internet is located here, on a single CD-ROM!"
Part of the glorious Linux master race.

[Image: 687474703a2f2f7075752e73682f69534f65312f...362e706e67]
[Image: 68747470733a2f2f692e696d6775722e636f6d2f...412e6a7067]
Zee Quality
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04-11-2016, 05:23 PM
#39501 (70)
Aliens keep get themselves killed out of senselessness and stupidity, while the player is just an abstract entity that isn't even really acknowledged in the game's fluff.

Spoiler

Creatures 3/Docking Station
tn5421
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04-12-2016, 05:42 AM
#39525 (71)
(04-11-2016, 12:54 AM)Equinox Wrote: you go on missions to fix things just to destroy the whole place and leave


Spore's galactic expansion?

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Derfy
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05-06-2016, 04:53 PM
#40897 (72)
Some ass hole locks you in prison to try and steal your girl friend. They don't even give you a weapon until the end of the first level. The puzzles are intricate but frustrating and the timing of your running jumps have to be perfect. There is a bunch of trial and error and a ghost version of yourself after jumping through a mirror is a complete fuck to you. The game is timed and has a ridiculous password system which is annoying and frustrating. A mouse saves your life even though that is totally unrealistic. Some of the power ups even hurt you why the fuck is that even a thing!? Plus you play as some Indian fuck with parachute pants.

Spoiler

Prince of Persia for the Super Nintendo
Apophany
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05-07-2016, 04:16 AM
#40909 (73)
All you do is walk around. A guy just talks at you while you're doing literally nothing but walking through a bunch of levels that make no sense. The guy tries to tell you how each one makes sense, but at the very end, it turns out they don't and he's devastated. Also the dev won't make anymore of them, and you cry because it's beautiful.
tn5421
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05-17-2016, 07:39 AM
#41308 (74)
you spin until you win

the spoiler

diablo 3 and/or league of legends

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syntax
error❌
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05-17-2016, 07:43 AM
#41311 (75)
Click the circles. To the beat.

Spoiler

osu!